A couple of months ago, I happened to be in a hopital gift shop with my sister and Uncle, @BobSongs.

We were simply killing time, browsing the trinkets, teddy bears and other tacky items you would expect to find in a hospital gift shop.

Suddenly, we spotted a lonely wooden figurine.

It was a bunch of grapes with a cute little face painted on and with dangling feet, clearly made in China.

And it just so happened to be Mother’s Day the following weekend. Coincidence? I think not.

We had to buy the thing, partially because we knew my mom would hate it, and partially because we couldn’t comprehend why anyone else would buy a sick relative or friend a bunch of wooden grapes as a get-well present.

Henry the Grape-th, as we have lovingly named him, now resides in our beautifully decorated kitchen, sticking out like a sore thumb.

Last weekend, I was in Lytton, and had the opportunity to visit Hell’s Gates.

While in the tourist gift shop on the cliffs surrounding the Fraser River, I found Henry’s brothers and sisters.

There were ugly potato figurines, grungy orange decorations and smiling watermelons galore.

As a souvenir, I just had to buy my mom the banana man; he was by far the cutest.

Plus, he goes very nicely with Henry.

I was made aware that one day, I will be inheriting this oddball collection of fruit.

But in the meantime, I am going to spoil my mom with tacky gifts.

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